Uncovering the South Park Timeline — Part 3

Jeffrey McGee
3 min readAug 5, 2022

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And… I’m at it again

Some two months ago, I dedicated two articles back-to-back to examine the chronology of South Park, arguably one of the most ingenious comedies ever written. Even though I might be a bit brown-nosing, Trey Parker is quite remarkable in his ability to identify the current state of the world as translates it into a satirical wonder (Matt Stone too, but I can’t get Parker’s voice out of my head). In truth, it’s quite hard to find consistency in the lore of South Park, considering that it’s not the focus of the show. But I recently watched the recent made-for-TV movies, South Park The Streaming Wars, parts 1 and 2, as they show interesting information regarding this whole South Park timeline thing. So, without too many spoilers, here’s another take on figuring out why characters never age.

As for the movie itself (which is made-for-TV), it had the usual South Park themes to it, so it wasn’t too different from a regular episode, just a longer one (I guess that’s why it’s made-for-TV). But that’s not what I want to talk about; I tried to examine the South Park timeline with the COVID made-for-TV movies, but it didn’t really lead to anything. As I said, I won’t spoil it too much, but in part 2 of this really long South Park episode, there is a very precise throwback to the first season, which was 25 years ago. I suppose that the agelessness of the characters can probably be attributed to Cthulhu (no, really, Cthulhu is the reason Kenny can’t die), but the characters that are present in these contemporary movies recall memories from a time long ago when they were still the same age as they are now. But is there still hope of finding something that can truly crack this timeline case?

If the characters really are the same from 25 years ago, then how is it that some tidbits are left out? It’s important to remember that the writers, which is mostly Trey Parker (at least according to the credits), don’t really explore the lore (as they say) of their own show, and they probably don’t take it too seriously. I suppose you could try to examine the inconsistencies that have occurred in previous episodes in relation to the events in South Park The Streaming Wars (yes, written like that), but aside from time travel being invented by two different sources according to the canon of the show, there aren’t many discrepancies to point out. In truth, it’s possible that everything that ever happened in South Park is canon, even if the information overlaps with itself.

Shorty-short article!

These days, I am working on a passion project of mine, Ocean of Giants, and that should be my main focus nowadays, at least until I’m done with it. I know this doesn’t excuse me from writing an even shorter-than-usual article, but at least when I’m done with it, I can say that I have made a video game for everyone to play, so until then, this article is remarkably short.

I really wanted to examine the South Park timeline one more time, but the truth is that it’s all still canon, even if there is some minor discrepancy, I don’t think neither Parker nor Stone care too much about the lore to actually do anything about it, otherwise, they would’ve already done something about it. It’s their show in the end, and I will watch whatever they provide me.

So, while keeping it really short, this is definitely not me trying to get some free time with video games because I’m busy making my own video game. It’s quite hard, I must say because I don’t know jack about Unity. The only thing that I think of when working with it is, “why can’t computers understand English like normal people?” and then I think about how easier it was if they did… but they don’t.

In the meantime, keep watching South Park, and if you spot anything that can help with my South Park timeline theory, be sure to drop me a tidbit. Who knows, maybe there is a mystery to crack. But this time, how about you go first…

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